Who You Surround Yourself with Matters

Who you surround yourself with matters, a lot more than you think. This is probably one of the (if not the) biggest lessons I’ve learned the past year or so. Who you choose to surround yourself with matters a LOT. It’s a game changer. It alters your life in ways you’ve never thought of or fail to notice at first. And to me, it’s one of the most essential parts of every decade in your life, especially your 20s.

 

But why is it so intrinsically important we surround ourselves with good people?

 

They make life so much easier, especially the right people. 

 

Defining ‘right’ when it comes to people you choose to have around you is entirely subjective. If I had to speak for myself, then I’d say that the right people are those who simply make you feel good. They don’t make anything feel like a burden, and when life does get a bit heavy, they’re the people that you can confide in without thinking about it too much. To me it also means that they don’t try to solve your problems, but instead, they try to offer support in their own way while navigating whatever it is you’re concerned about with you.

 

When you feel some type of way, call a friend and say hey

 

When shit hits the fan, the first person you’d want to tell is a friend or someone you genuinely trust. Having such people around is a blessing in disguise. There was this one time I was having a day, and I posted a random blurb on Pi.Fyi. “Please, have the right people around you” is what I chose to title it as, and I was surprised to see that lots of others agreed. “Got similar advice when I was quite young, didn't truly get it until I had done it. Like oh yeah that was real advice” said one user, and I couldn’t agree more. You’ll understand when it happens, like you’ll understand how important it truly is.

 

You begin to fall in love with life

 

There have been countless of times where I’ve found myself sitting back (or lying down on wet grass in the middle of winter —perks of Capture the Flag Fridays), where I’ve simply subconsciously muted everything around me and all I focus on is my friends and how beautiful they are, how lucky I feel to be surrounded by such beautiful souls. Quite frankly, it is through friendships you learn most things about human relationships and their complexities.

I have been blessed with people that I never thought I’d meet. Unfortunately for my heart, a few of them are scattered across the world. But that doesn’t mean I don’t get the same exact feeling with them, and if anything, I probably feel everything I talked about earlier intensely. Getting off of FaceTime with my best friends (shoutout Jacqueline and Bentley) leaves me feeling invincible.

I love my people. I am consumed by love for my people.

 

Try being around good-and-unapologetically-themselves people

 

We live in a world where we have millions of narratives being forced onto us without avail. It’s brutal out here and individuality is something that we have begun to lack. Over the years I’ve noticed that I’ve began to naturally gravitate towards people that are very much themselves, even among great masses. It’s very refreshing and there’s no need to ask for validation —it’s there. Surround yourself with people that won’t try and change you. Which brings me to…

 

The right ones will enable you to change

 

Change is scary but so is staying the same. There’s traits we dislike about ourselves and others that we love. Spending time with the right people forces you to change shape and grow out of this mold you’re in. They shake you up just enough so that you reach a point where you accept the fact that you have to better yourself. Again, it is through friendships that you learn how human relationships function.

 

*Before you potentially find me in the hallway and eat me alive for saying this, I don’t mean being forced to change (for the worst). This is based on your judgement and circumstances and whatever it is you’re being told to change. I’m talking about having a friend being like, “Hey, this sucks btw, why are you accepting this or doing this to yourself? Change that.”

 

Good people make you a good person. Everything’s good when you’re surrounded by goodness.